The Jokes by Jo Show
The Jokes by Jo Show
"Can We Say Penis?" - With Comedian Kate Hughes
In this episode of the 'Jokes by Jo Show,' host Josiah James, co-host Doug McHizzle, and comedian Kate Hughes dive into hilariously awkward moments and sharp social commentary. They recount Halloween scheduling mishaps, critique Courtney Pauroso's 'Vanessa 5000' special, and discuss Tony Hinchcliffe's disastrous Trump rally joke. The trio tackles gender disparities in comedy, share a comical 'vote and fart' language twist, and divulge personal stories. Amidst workshopping new material and narrating their past experiences, the laughter is relentless.
00:00 Introduction and Opening Banter
00:34 Welcome to the Jokes by Jo Show
01:08 Halloween Plans and Parenting
04:29 Comedy and Controversy
06:30 Women in Comedy
12:04 Election Reactions and Personal Struggles
30:01 Relationships and Personal Stories
33:15 Art and Inspiration
34:39 Upcoming Topics and Research
35:00 Comedian's Special on Dropout
35:39 Debating the Comedian's Style
38:09 Louis CK Controversy
39:46 R. Kelly and Michael Jackson Discussion
41:26 Don't Tell Comedy Show
44:03 Hosting and Open Mic Experiences
48:31 Joke Workshop and Period Jokes
01:04:14 Tooth Fairy Mission Impossible
01:07:09 Conclusion and Farewell
The Jokes by Jo Show: Dive into the world of humor with comedian Josiah James, comedian Doug McHizzle, and Co-Co as they bring you witty banter, edgy jokes, and hilarious anecdotes. Join us as we workshop jokes and refine our comedy craft. For more laughs and updates, visit jokesbyjo.com. Got a joke or feedback? Email us at podcast@jokesbyjo.com. Follow us on TikTok at @jokesbyjo and on Instagram at @jokesbyjo for exclusive content and behind-the-scenes fun!
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"Can We Say Penis?" - With Comedian Kate Hughes
===
[00:00:00] Introduction and Opening Banter
---
Josiah: Alright,
Josiah: alright, alright, alright, let's just fucking do it.
Doug: Come on.
Josiah: Ha,
Josiah: Ha ha ha Oh, was that a shrill whistle or what?
Doug: been like you were being
Josiah: being choked. I
Doug: And you just have happened. You have your mouth in the
Josiah: to have your mouth and look. Whistle. Well, good to have you back, Doug. Welcome
Doug: Hey,
Josiah: the J For English, press 1. Boop!
[00:00:34] Welcome to the Jokes by Joe Show
---
Josiah: Welcome to the Jokes by Joe show. I am your host, Doug. Josiah James. I'm with my cohost, Doug McKizzle, and we have a very special guest this evening.
Josiah: Her name is the one, the only Kate Hughes. Welcome to the show.
Kate Hughes: Yay! Thank you. Thanks for having me. I'm very happy to be here. I'm in the bathroom, guys. I'm
Kate Hughes: sorry.
Josiah: hear yourself through the,
Kate Hughes: I sound good. Yeah.
Kate Hughes: But I sound like I'm in the bathroom. She
Josiah: has a radio voice because she does radio show. She's just going to blow all of our voices out of the water.
Kate Hughes: of the water.
Kate Hughes: Yeah, watch out. Get scared. Get scared,
Josiah: Yeah, we've got an exciting show.
[00:01:08] Halloween Plans and Parenting
---
Josiah: We, we were gonna, actually, two weeks ago, it was Halloween, we were gonna record, I had an entire agenda about all this stuff that's gonna happen before, before the election, and then it's kind of like a moot point now. So I don't know if you want to talk about any of
Doug: about it Well, no, I thought you were going to the point of it was thursday And we had everything planned and I even the whole day in my head.
Doug: I was like, all right I gotta do the podcast. Uh, nick was having the halloween open mic I was like, oh i'll do that and then i'll go to trivia and all that and then I was like Trick or treatings tonight. I gotta be a fucking dad! Then I texted him like, and I was like, dude, I completely forgot trick or treating
Josiah: Yeah. And I was like, we can reschedule. And then, and then it was I went, Crickets. Doug, we can reschedule. That's what I got.
Kate Hughes: From
Doug: you said that? Wait, am I doing that now? About how I did that before? He's Yeah, no, uh, I'm so glad. Nobody helps me when he's doing that.
Kate Hughes: I never responded? No. I
Josiah: I'm getting you back. Yeah.
Doug: never responded? I just thought you sent me an agenda.
Doug: You sent me like the, you sent me like the topics, and I said, oh, I was going to take some notes. Yeah. And, and I did, mentally. But,
Doug: I don't remember.
Kate Hughes: you mentally got
Kate Hughes: back to
Doug: to him. Yeah.
Kate Hughes: Probably. That's
Doug: I just thought we were connected, man.
Josiah: She's in
Doug: I guess
Josiah: other bathroom.
Kate Hughes: You know what's weird? Can I just talk about the Halloween thing? Yeah. I mean, okay, so that was the 31st, is that right?
Doug: yeah.
Kate Hughes: So, I'm not from around here, and I know that there's trick or treat on certain nights.
Kate Hughes: It's the Friday before
Josiah: the weekend. The Friday weekend before, correct.
Kate Hughes: Yeah, but, why? I'm like,
Doug: So, I grew up in New York. New York was It was on Halloween you go trick or treating if you had school the next day didn't
Josiah: didn't
Kate Hughes: we were tough.
Doug: Lower Nazareth is like that's where I live.
Doug: So lower Nazareth is like that. Yeah, it's it's Halloween but when I moved out here and Like they were like somebody at work was like when's trick or treating and I was like at night on Halloween. What are you talking about
Kate Hughes: idiot, where did I
Doug: They're like now I live in Bath And Bath does It different than Wengap, and that goes different than Nazareth, and I'm like, are you, like, you're telling me if I had a bike and I'm a kid, I can ride to different neighborhoods?
Kate Hughes: bike
Doug: would. I would have candy year round. Oh, same. That's what I would have done. Yeah.
Kate Hughes: I would have candy year round. We did it of
Doug: the week. And the town that I grew up in. Tuesday.
Josiah: school the next day.
Doug: Dobbs Ferry. Dobbs Ferry had it's a town between Yonkers and Terrytown. So, like the Tappan Zee Bridge. And they have two main streets, Cedar Street and Main Street. And they shut those streets down. And that's like a main artery to get from, like, downtown to North Westchester.
Doug: And you gotta, if you take Broadway, you gotta drive through that. That's it. That's the only way to go. And they shut that down during the week. On Halloween
Kate Hughes: For trick or
Doug: Yeah, they do the fire department does a haunted house
Kate Hughes: that's
Doug: Yeah, I mean it's it was really fun when we moved from Yonkers to that Yonkers still the Yonkers did it on Halloween But when we moved to that we thought we were in like a movie
Kate Hughes: Yeah,
Josiah: yeah,
[00:04:29] Comedy and Controversy
---
Josiah: we can, we can start with the one topic. I, I didn't send this to you, but One of the rallies right before the election. Donald Trump had a comedian open for him.
Josiah: It was Kill Tony, Tony, uh, what? Hinchcliffe. Yep. We've talked about him on the show before because Doug, like, I think, binged Kill Tony. Like, watched it all the time. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So he made this comment. I'm sure you've heard about it, about the, um, the floating pile of garbage in Puerto Rico.
Josiah: was Puerto
Josiah: Rico. That was Puerto Rico. Right. And everyone's like, Oh, that's it. You know? Well, a lot of backlash. What do you, what do you want to call that?
Doug: I think it was people who didn't know who Tony Hinchcliffe was. Yeah,
Josiah: right. They don't know he's an insult
Doug: Anybody who knew who he was was like, oh, he's just doing his tone. The thing that I felt worst about with that performance and that, that, that whole set was he was in Madison Square Garden and his jokes were bombing in front of an audience that they were specially for.
Doug: Like that that was material that only they should have been
Josiah: laughing at. You mean like MAGA crowd?
Doug: well. Yeah, that's what he wrote it for and and He was in Madison Square Garden And you can you can hear the silence of after so I feel more bad that his jokes bombed You know, as a comedian, anything that he said, it was, I feel, it didn't even land.
Doug: The
Josiah: I wanted to bring this up was he workshopped that joke the night before at a, at a comedy club.
Josiah: It didn't go over well. And then Joe Rogan said to him, don't do that bit. And so now I feel a bit like Tony because, and you're Joe Rogan, Doug's always giving me advice. Like don't do this. Don't do that. And I go out and I do it anyway. So Tony was just like, I'm, I'm going to do it.
Doug: Actually quite the opposite.
Kate Hughes: Be yourself.
Doug: what I tell them to do. Just do talk about yourself and what you do and how it really happened Don't try to don't try to turn it into a performance
Kate Hughes: well, I mean, you don't have to, because you guys have penises, but,
Josiah: guys have penises, but Penis.
Kate Hughes: I say penis? can. Oh, perfect.
Doug: No
Josiah: know if you
Doug: I
Kate Hughes: don't know if you guys noticed.
Josiah: I, mean,
[00:06:30] Women in Comedy
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Doug: I mean, yeah, I think women have it hard in any Just in comedy though. In, in any, definitely in stand up. I mean, they always have.
Josiah: Comedy. Oh,
Doug: I
Kate Hughes: know the answer. I think women don't want to see women come up on stage and root for them. They immediately don't like them, so you have to
Josiah: It is. It always is like
Kate Hughes: always is like that.
Kate Hughes: Like if you're a successful woman or something, people have this weird feeling about you. But comedy You're putting yourself on display where you're vulnerable and they know that and they can attack you kind of thing, you know So you have to like either not care come off as arrogant or whatever and sometimes that works Sometimes that doesn't or win them over with some kind of self deprecating thing But yeah It is it is and they judge you about like by what you look like as well and then men don't like you because men We just think even I
Kate Hughes: am like
Kate Hughes: Women aren't funny.
Kate Hughes: I really think that. I'm like, I, there's
Josiah: had an entire
Doug: don't think it's that women aren't funny. I just think that The
Josiah: play back the tape doug
Doug: I didn't. I never said, I never said women aren't funny. I said, women suck at telling stories. Yeah.
Josiah: Yeah,
Doug: know a ton. I know Caitlyn Adams now, or Oh, right. Should be Caitlyn.
Doug: Yeah. Yeah. She is absolutely hilarious. She's one of my wife's funniest friends. Yeah. She's hysteric on the planet. She can just make a face and I start cracking up. You know what I mean? So yeah, and she just did that. She was at the house, uh, of like two weeks ago or something and she came outside into the back.
Doug: I was out back and she came out back and just did this little, she was like, how are you doing? How are you doing? And it just, I was crying. She's good. So yeah,
Josiah: a comedian? She's
Kate Hughes: my bud. She should be! She should
Doug: again,
Josiah: I can't. She's
Doug: Very funny. But I don't know if I want to hear her tell a
Doug: story.
Josiah: Okay.
Kate Hughes: if I want to hear her tell a story.
Doug: is absolutely one of my wife's best
Josiah: We gotta have her on on the show to have her tell a story.
Kate Hughes: friends.
Josiah: Yeah. She's,
Doug: she's she's I mean very funny very funny person And and can she can be and and a lot of my wife's friend I'll put it this way as far as let's just take take keep it to I don't want to Specify anybody All of my wife's friends are funny. Like, they are all, like, really funny.
Doug: Where you can sit around and really crack the fuck up. Meredith, Meg, all these women are just
Josiah: I don't want to name names.
Doug: I said I don't want to specify what I'm saying to one
Josiah: Barker, Beaker, Bracken, Buka, Cornell, Dossal, Haines, Hendricks, Lee, Letcher,
Doug: these people or bacteria?
Josiah: Revenaugh, Rollman, Not to name names, Williams, Villavuduena, I'm not going to name names here guys, but.
Kate Hughes: I don't know what the first couple names were, though. Oh,
Doug: I don't, I don't, but Julia My sister, Quiana, Chiffon. Just, I mean, in general, in
Josiah: I don't want to
Kate Hughes: Okay.
Doug: in general.
Kate Hughes: I don't wanna put anybody's fingers. No, I
Doug: I think the other hard part for women. Yeah,
Kate Hughes: again, tell me what you think Women have it rough doing?
Doug: no, no, I, I'm going to actually, I, I, I agree. I think one of the other hard parts about a woman how hard it is to become a comedian and successful is that. Because the, the, to, to get, you know, you got to network and all that. And there's a lot of fucking scumbags in the comedy world.
Doug: They,
Kate Hughes: at two of them right now. They just, they just, you
Doug: but I mean like they just, they see the woman and they're, and a lot of them are single.
Doug: You know living with their roommates and stuff
Kate Hughes: In the basement of their mom's
Doug: yeah, so they just want to
Josiah: they have to,
Doug: they're just like oh
Josiah: their way up.
Doug: I wonder if I can make you know, I wonder if you know what I mean
Kate Hughes: outnumbered, so. So
Doug: you're going through this gauntlet of single dicks and then and then and then
Josiah: I'll get you up on stage.
Kate Hughes: Yeah, exactly. Don't think that hasn't
Josiah: Yeah, I'll get
Doug: I'm i'm without a doubt.
Doug: I I know other women comedians that they just it's just oh my
Josiah: get you up on the inkwell. Just let, let me, let me in your inkwell
Kate Hughes: sleep my way to the top
Josiah: And none of these are
Doug: me in your ear
Josiah: you know who tries to be sexy on stage? Oh, God.
Kate Hughes: Kate Hughes.
Josiah: Nikki Glaser. Nikki Glaser.
Doug: Glaser. Yeah. She's funny by herself. She is. Just be funny.
Josiah: She is. She doesn't need to
Doug: And if you're not funny enough to where you have to add
Kate Hughes: Like you hate it, like you guys hate it. Okay. Oh, this okay.
Kate Hughes: Oh, man. No, it's
Doug: have to be fun put it this way, I'll watch Ellen DeGeneres over any other woman
Josiah: Mm-Hmm.
Doug: She's great and, and she's, because she's 100% funny.
Josiah: I haven't seen her new Netflix special, but I heard it was pretty Is it good?
Kate Hughes: not
Doug: it, so I watched it the day it came out.
Doug: Have to watch that. Yeah, it was great.
Josiah: All I did was read reviews and they're just like,
Kate Hughes: they're
Josiah: fived. Yes.
Doug: gotta watch it without you.
Kate Hughes: You gotta watch
Music Bed: bla bla bla
Doug: Yeah. She goes into, she goes in, she goes into. You know, basically the two times she got fired from Hollywood and she
Kate Hughes: She uses
Doug: She uses that as a, as a backdrop, just stealing my jokes. Yeah. And, uh, it's really, really good.
Josiah: Lesbian and lesbian.
Josiah: lesbian.
Doug: Second was that she was being mean. Oh,
Josiah: mean. Oh, mean. Lesbian, mean lesbian.
Doug: Well, and that's kind of what she says is Okay. You know, just so you know, there's, don't ruin it.
Doug: Well. Yeah. Well, I'm, I mean. You gotta watch it. He's ruin it. I was gonna ruin it.
Josiah: Alright, I'll watch it. I will watch it.
Doug: He's not gonna
Doug: watch it.
Kate Hughes: I'll watch
Doug: ruin. I could ruin it, right? How to watch it. I could ruin it right now. And in 10 years he's gonna be like, dude, you ruined it. . I finally watched it
Kate Hughes: it.
[00:12:04] Election Reactions and Personal Struggles
---
Josiah: back to the kill Tony thing. Everyone was saying because of this comment now Trump's not going to win. Well, obviously that didn't happen.
Kate Hughes: who said
Doug: happen. Who said ? Wait. Who said because of that joke? He wasn't gonna win everybody. It wasn't, it, no, hold on. It wasn't the thousand other things that he did.
Doug: It was, it was, that was the one.
Josiah: because there's 500, 000 Puerto Ricans in. Pennsylvania voting and they, they thought, Oh, well, he just lost them. Pennsylvania,
Doug: thing. There's 500, 000 Puerto Ricans. How many voted and how many didn't vote for him?
Josiah: Yeah. I don't know. Yeah.
Doug: You know what I mean?
Kate Hughes: name the talk show host people jimmy
Doug: people, Uh,
Josiah: Jimmy Fallon.
Kate Hughes: No
Kate Hughes: maybe it was jimmy
Doug: Kimmel, Michael Jackson, uh, Seth, my sister Chiffon, Seth Meyer. Caitlin Adams, Meredith
Kate Hughes: J Was it Seth Meyers? No, I think it's Jimmy Kimmel. I can't remember what he looks like right now. Is he the one that's sensitive and cries sometimes? Yeah. Okay.
Josiah: Well, he's the man show guy. Adam Carolla from
Doug: you're, you're, yeah. He's,
Kate Hughes: right? Okay. Hot
Josiah: Chicks.
Doug: he cried when he uh, when Trump won.
Kate Hughes: he cried about that.
Doug: started getting
Josiah: Wait, we talking about Van Jones here?
Doug: Are you, what?
Kate Hughes: Jimmy Kimmel.
Doug: Who's Van Jones? Yeah,
Kate Hughes: who's Van Jones?
Josiah: commentator that always cries.
Doug: I don't watch those
Josiah: Okay. Oh, yeah. I don't
Doug: don't watch those channels. We don't, we don't do
Josiah: do that. We don't do that.
Kate Hughes: I
Doug: totally
Kate Hughes: forget why I brought up Jimmy Kimmel.
Doug: you were saying I totally
Josiah: Something about Trump or Was it about Trump?
Kate Hughes: It definitely was. Oh, I know! Okay, so he, uh, Jimmy Kimmel. It's the day after it, so it's Wednesday, right?
Doug: Yeah,
Doug: yeah. Thursday.
Josiah: Tuesday was election day. Day after Tuesday. Like
Kate Hughes: so it was Wednesday. So he shows his phone and he's like, this is Wednesday, whatever
Kate Hughes: the day was, 6th or
Kate Hughes: whatever. He's like, Trump's already won, he's in office, the election was yesterday. We're gonna go on the streets and interview
Doug: Oh yeah.
Josiah: Oh yeah. I did see that.
Kate Hughes: And they're like, are you voting
Kate Hughes: today? Yeah.
Josiah: Yes. Yes.
Kate Hughes: And they're like, yeah, and they're lying.
Josiah: lying. Yeah
Kate Hughes: He's like, what are the lines like? Oh,
Doug: it hasn't, it's
Kate Hughes: too bad.
Doug: I'm like, what
Kate Hughes: what is wrong with these people? And then the last
Kate Hughes: guy, the
Kate Hughes: last guy is like, like, are you going to vote? And he's like, uh, yeah. And he's like, who, who, uh, who are you going to vote for? And he was like who's running
Kate Hughes: for
Doug: yeah. Bush. And then I was like, just get out of here.
Josiah: here. You know, what else is alarming is the number one search You
Josiah: On election day was
Kate Hughes: how
Kate Hughes: can I change my vote?
Josiah: No, no
Doug: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I saw that.
Josiah: did Joe Biden drop out of the race? That was the number one search on Google. So that that lets you know how how in touch
Doug: I'll tell you why that is. It wasn't, I don't know if that was, I don't know if that was how it was worded. I, well, I'll put it this way.
Doug: Was it definitely that or because I know that there's a thing floating around that Biden should resign so that
Josiah: can become president. It
Kate Hughes: that. It's a
Doug: woman president, but be the first woman president. And there's like, there's things that people have been floating around,
Josiah: Yeah, it wasn't that. It was people were like, did Joe Biden drop out of the race? So they like had no idea.
Josiah: That's that. Very out of touch.
Doug: they got to the ballot and was like, Who the hell is
Kate Hughes: this? Who is this? Ha ha ha ha!
Josiah: Cam
Doug: They got the curtain, they got the curtain.
Josiah: Cameltoe? Where
Kate Hughes: the
Doug: my Biden?
Josiah: button?
Kate Hughes: Wait a
Doug: You guys are screwing up the ballot.
Josiah: What in the hell happened to
Doug: I don't know why they have a southern accent. But I feel
Josiah: Harris, Biden, Harris, Biden, her
Kate Hughes: Biting her ass!
Josiah: I'm biting her ass.
Doug: I why do they always have a southern accent, I don't
Josiah: Good question. It's just easy to do.
Doug: just it just can't
Josiah: You just go to it.
Doug: you can't do a
Kate Hughes: pile
Kate Hughes: of garbage.
Josiah: Yeah. Yeah,
Doug: it just you gotta have when you're talking about
Doug: you wanna know about trucks, I'm not gonna listen to somebody with an accent from Maine. yeah. Tell me about
Kate Hughes: thought that, that joke was purposeful to like get him to lose. That's what I thought.
Doug: Oh, you thought,
Josiah: Oh. Well, interesting.
Doug: Yeah, and here's the, my take on it. Here's everyone
Josiah: thought Trump was saying stuff to lose because
Doug: they're they're
Kate Hughes: eating the dogs They're eating the cats
Josiah: go ahead Doug.
Doug: No, but yeah, that's why when that happened, it was like this is the ups. This is the part you're upset with like, you know, nothing that's been happening for six
Kate Hughes: know what
Josiah: timeline I'm in because now Now I, now I can't talk really because he, he won the popular vote, right? So now I am in a minority, you know, I'm not sure how you voted or how you voted,
Doug: Well, I don't know if you see there's two minorities here.
Josiah: two minorities here. Why is she a minority woman, woman?
Kate Hughes: woman? Are
Doug: now? No, she's wearing that hat and proud of it. Not too many people would be proud of that hat. Nobody is proud of that hat. I'm from Yugoslavia.
Doug: She's in the minority. No, let me
Kate Hughes: let me just
Doug: just tell you what this really is. Maybe you don't see it because you're both
Doug: you
Kate Hughes: look at it from like, say, a young girl's perspective, or a woman's perspective, take all the politics out of it, take everything
Doug: out of it,
Kate Hughes: and just look at these you have a convicted felon.
Kate Hughes: Right? Who's
Josiah: probably
Kate Hughes: a rapist.
Doug: I'm,
Kate Hughes: like, gonna
Josiah: well, he was convicted. Yeah. Yeah,
Josiah: so,
Kate Hughes: a rapist. So, definitely a
Josiah: We can say it. Yeah,
Kate Hughes: And
Doug: a crook. Can't say penis. You know, I
Kate Hughes: say penis,
Josiah: And
Kate Hughes: then there's this
Doug: woman.
Kate Hughes: who's educated
Josiah: and intelligent
Josiah: and
Doug: was
Kate Hughes: prosecutor
Doug: and knows
Kate Hughes: to speak and isn't insulting
Kate Hughes: people and she's kind and like, how,
Kate Hughes: how is he How does, how does that not win?
Doug: Cause he spoke to the people.
Doug: Oh,
Kate Hughes: Oh, I know. I know that.
Josiah: Well, the, uh, working
Doug: I'm not saying the people are smart and using common sense, but he's making them feel better.
Kate Hughes: better. With the
Josiah: yeah,
Doug: and not even telling them what he's gonna give them.
Kate Hughes: Well, they're
Doug: even
Kate Hughes: they're about to find out.
Doug: Yeah, he's just saying, he's
Josiah: be an interesting four years
Doug: it, it'll be alright.
Doug: We
Josiah: I was I was so depressed and this is like a common theme with me
Josiah: Depressed over losing the the Emmaus Competition.
Josiah: Yeah. But then I was in a deep depression because of the, the election and I'm still grieving over it. And I don't even lost my fucking train of thought. I don't even know what I was gonna say.
Doug: know a couple of friends who've dropped into that
Josiah: Oh, I was looking, yeah. Canada. I was gonna move to Canada.
Josiah: Okay. Because I don't wanna be here when, when, when what he s what he said he's gonna do. He does. Yeah.
Doug: what's
Doug: he gonna do to you
Josiah: He's going to take
Josiah: my podcast away.
Doug: away.
Kate Hughes: away.
Doug: is. But no, and I haven't just said those words to you this past week and a half. But
Kate Hughes: half. I just
Kate Hughes: keep
Doug: keep asking people, what is he going to do to you? Prepare for that. Because I have a friend who's Whose son was their daughter, right? And that's what they need to work like
Josiah: Like,
Doug: They may be fine economically or whatever if you need to worry about that now
Josiah: you know what my
Doug: So what are they going to do to you and prepare for that?
Josiah: You're white. And I said, well, I don't, I just don't want to be, I don't even want to be around the people that support this guy, which is he won the popular vote.
Josiah: just,
Doug: does it change your circle? You
Josiah: That's what
Doug: what I asked my wife. I said, how does it change our circle?
Kate Hughes: did it, does it?
Doug: No, not at all. Anybody who I know who voted for Trump is somebody that I just know from the bar. They're not in my circle and my circle doesn't change. All my friends, all my family are going to all
Josiah: my brother in law voted for Trump and they're having Thanksgiving this year. And I'm, I'm like, I'm not going. I said, I can't do it.
Doug: why, why, so, so hold on, hold on. So you're going to let Trump make you separate from your
Josiah: that. I have I've been in the hospital before, a mental hospital due to politics and it's like a a trigger for me. So I do not want to be at the table and have to talk about Trump.
Doug: Are you going to bring it up?
Josiah: no, but I'm sure they will and rub it in our face.
Doug: You think so?
Josiah: Well, just in
Doug: They're spiteful like that?
Josiah: I don't really know. I just, I think I just want to stay home. You don't
Doug: want to, you don't want to risk it.
Josiah: I don't want to risk it. I don't want to end up in the hospital again.
Doug: would you do if they did? Like how crazy does it get?
Josiah: I don't know, man. I mean, I even got, I got crazy last night. My kids wouldn't go to bed, and then Arya broke a, um, She broke a, uh, picture, and I threw her across
Kate Hughes: Arya's the grandmother, just so everyone knows.
Kate Hughes: Arya's the, uh, It's
Doug: the, uh, the female MMA trainer that he's friends with. It was not a child. It was not Oh, okay, you threw her Okay, you
Josiah: Graydon's coming in, I was like, Stay in your fucking room! My wife, my wife walks in, I was like, Get out of my fucking
Kate Hughes: face!
Doug: And then she kicked her ass.
Josiah: is all like, bubbling up to the surface from like the past week. It all just erupted last night.
Doug: Did you talk to anybody about this? Do you have a therapist?
Josiah: I do have a therapist. We, we talked today
Doug: And you don't have to tell me what you said to them, but
Kate Hughes: but, what did you say? Yeah,
Josiah: you
Doug: want to get into details, but
Kate Hughes: tell us everything
Doug: specifically, what did you
Josiah: not going to name names, um, but her name is Melissa and she's, she's very good.
Kate Hughes: awesome.
Doug: Really
Kate Hughes: Yeah.
Josiah: We, uh, we meet once a week. And so I met with her today and I told her that I pretty much went psycho on my family. And. I hit bottom.
Doug: What got you there though? What? What is getting you
Josiah: I have no idea. I think it's like maybe a culmination
Doug: are Yeah. Yes. Yeah.
Kate Hughes: That is what it is.
Doug: so I mean, but is it specifically politics?
Doug: No, no, no. Okay. That's part,
Josiah: it. It's part of it. I think that's,
Kate Hughes: the world,
Josiah: it's the, that's the under underlying That's the rock bed. And then them just like not listening
Doug: Oh, trust me.
Josiah: Oh god,
Doug: parent has that with the kids where it's like, I wish it was legal to punch you. Like, not punch you. I don't want to punch.
Doug: I want to punt you. I want to kick you through the field goal.
Josiah: don't know. I'd
Doug: love
Kate Hughes: to kick a baby. Just for that. Just for the
Kate Hughes: record, funny. I don't know any, but I think I would like to
Doug: No, those are the ones you do. You don't want to do it to your own.
Doug: Yeah. Somebody else's.
Doug: You got to deal with the broken ribs and
Josiah: No, I voted. I don't know, you guys voted?
Kate Hughes: No, I didn't
Josiah: I you didn't vote?
Doug: did. explain it. Of course
Kate Hughes: I voted.
Doug: I only voted for, I only voted for state auditor.
Josiah: I didn't like, I didn't like
Doug: left everything else
Josiah: Either, I didn't like either candidate, so I actually did a write
Josiah: in. The First
Josiah: time I did a write in, okay? How
Kate Hughes: times did you vote? Just He said the first time he did a write in. Oh
Josiah: the first! It's the first time. First time I did a write in. I thought you were writting.
Kate Hughes: the first time I went in I did a
Doug: got you on that one.
Kate Hughes: The second time I went
Josiah: I did in. I
Doug: fifth time I voted, on my fifth time Tuesday.
Kate Hughes: fifth
Josiah: time of voting, my true love said to
Doug: me? I
Kate Hughes: I didn't know, I
Josiah: didn't know. I did a write in. I wrote I'm probably the only one that did
Doug: yeah, yeah. So, what
Kate Hughes: did you write?
Doug: So, this is on the record, this is on national record.
Josiah: is. President
Josiah: Penis potato. That's what I wrote
Doug: Penis Potato. Yes. Is somewhere gonna be, it's gonna be somewhere in the Library of Congress.
Doug: Or wherever, the Hall of Records or whatever you can do.
Josiah: Seriously, I've got to be the only one that wrote that in, right? Did you write that in?
Doug: I wrote that in. Not
Josiah: Oh, she did.
Josiah: So there's two.
Kate Hughes: of
Doug: of us did that.
Josiah: I was like, there's not going to be that many.
Doug: Penis Potato. Ha ha
Josiah: ha ha ha!
Kate Hughes: it up. I like it. I'm trying to switch
Josiah: up. But here's the thing. Thank you. I'm thinking now that more people wrote that in. Because
Doug: think Penis Potato had a I
Josiah: so, because we
Doug: up He interrupted the
Josiah: We ended up electing a dictator.
Doug: And dictator, fetus potato,
Kate Hughes: And dictator,
Josiah: potato. Yeah, it's kind of like the same thing. Yeah. It probably tastes the same too. Just a little bit of ketchup
Doug: I'm just, I'm glad there's no knives around, because if you ever try to draw me
Josiah: where's the rim?
Doug: like that again Wait,
Kate Hughes: it's, yeah.
Doug: so, how much of that was you getting to that? Have you been yelling at your kids and throwing them around and stuff? I don't know.
Josiah: No, that was just last, that was
Kate Hughes: for the record for the record Guys
Doug: How many times did you murder your wife?
Doug: Just once? Just
Josiah: I'm going to kill you until you die from it. I
Kate Hughes: watch a lot of investigation discovery and there are people that say things like I only shot her one
Josiah: time. I only shot her once.
Doug: like watching those, uh, the ones where it's just the interrogations.
Kate Hughes: Oh yeah.
Doug: you
Josiah: Oh, and they don't know that the cops have all the information, and then
Doug: They try
Josiah: try to pretend like
Doug: Yeah, or they, they just, they just don't know how to be interrogated.
Doug: They're just, they just think they, they think they got away with it.
Kate Hughes: Yeah. They always think they got away with
Doug: it. Yeah, they think their bullshit is just solid. I can't, I can't imagine
Kate Hughes: like planning a murder at like 15. I mean, I've seen some kids doing some
Doug: Yeah. And they, and they
Kate Hughes: they think that that's like a
Josiah: a good. I saw this woman who killed someone in a DUI with her car. She was a college student and she was in the hospital being interrogated by the police officer and the only thing she cared about was
Kate Hughes: oh god.
Kate Hughes: No
Josiah: how she could if she could go to school tomorrow?
Doug: Oh, I saw that one I saw that one. Yeah.
Doug: Yeah. Yeah
Kate Hughes: in her defense in her defense the body's in shock, she's probably in shock, right?
Josiah: I don't know. I think I have no idea. It was it was absurd.
Doug: brain was just not working
Kate Hughes: not firing on Yeah,
Josiah: so I had a psychotic episode last night and I think
Kate Hughes: election was probably not the foundation, I think it
Kate Hughes: was like
Kate Hughes: the match
Josiah: yes, probably.
Josiah: So now I just need to my goal now is to put out because I have a feeling in the next four years are going to be a lot of negativity. So my goal is to counteract that. with putting positive, funny things out there.
Kate Hughes: that's what I'm going to
Josiah: do. Which is why I'm Good! Let's tag team.
Josiah: to do all the time. I know, dude. You're hilarious.
Doug: don't want anybody to ever have a
Josiah: light up a room, anytime you step into my kitchen, I'm just fucking laughing. The catchphrase that we use is, Save it for the podcast because we would, we used to talk upstairs and he'd have like the best stories and be like dude
Kate Hughes: You're like shut up
Josiah: it for the podcast My wife made me watch a show on Netflix the new show with Kristen Bell.
Josiah: Oh
Doug: my god!
Josiah: Did you see it?
Kate Hughes: freaking love that show.
Kate Hughes: Nobody wants
Josiah: she has a pod. Yeah, she has a podcast
Kate Hughes: she has
Josiah: She has a podcast. You know what , they were talking in the kitchen and they said, save it for the podcast. I was like, that's my fucking line.
Doug: no, I think I've heard I've heard people say that That's why I thought I thought you
Josiah: no. No, you have not, Doug. I, I made it
Doug: No, I don't want you I don't want you I don't
Josiah: some fucking credit.
Doug: don't want somebody saying it and you're going that's my shit And it just is I think it's he's so
Kate Hughes: mad about it, yeah. You've heard save it for the stage, right?
Doug: absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah yeah,
Doug: I, like I said, man, if, if I could have so much shit going on with me, but if I'm out, if I'm around people, it's, people talk about what's a disease and not a disease is alcoholism. A disease is, is a depression, a disease.
Doug: And I say alcoholism isn't a disease. Depression is, and I'll prove it. I could be in a, I sometimes I go on these things where I'm just like, I'm going to go out, but I'm not drinking. And somebody can come in and be like, Hey, Doug, you want a shot? And I'll be like, no, I'm not drinking. And that's it. That's the end of it.
Doug: I didn't get spread their alcoholism. Right. But if they came in and say, Hey, Doug, you want to do a shot with me? My mother just died. Now I'm depressed. They instantly airborne spread their depression to me. So, I don't want to spread mine to anybody. And so I try to just everybody around me, I want them laughing.
Doug: If they're going through something, I want to bring them out of it. I want them to see the, there's some sort of light at the end of it. You know what I mean? I want them laughing about it if they can. And like, if somebody, if somebody says, Oh, my grandmother died, and this works every single time. I, if they, if whoever died, I just go picture the last time you saw that person cracking up.
Doug: And every time it brings a smile to their face. Cause you can't not think of that memory without, now you're laughing about it. Now you're like, oh my god, it was just one time. Yeah. And it, and it, and again, it's not gonna, it's not a lasting, it's not gonna last. I'm just putting a band aid, but for that moment, you, you got out of that funk.
Doug: And that's what I think I can do a lot. And that's what I try to do a lot.
Kate Hughes: lot. And that's what I a
Doug: Oh, I was in my family. I was the one in the pictures like and stuff like that. You know what I mean? So
Kate Hughes: I mean? I was. Yes.
Josiah: clown of your family? Yeah. How
Kate Hughes: the class clown.
Josiah: family? Okay. How about you? have 17
Josiah: and
Kate Hughes: sisters. So a
Doug: I will name all of them now.
Josiah: will name all of them now.
Doug: And the one we called Handlebar. No, um,
Kate Hughes: we
Doug: No, uh, I have I have two younger sisters that I grew up with in the same house and an older brother. We all lived in the same house, but I have an older sister from my father's side that was in my life. She's definitely more in my life as far as she lives in Pennsylvania with me.
Doug: Anyway, but that's who I grew up with. Yeah. I grew up with an older brother and two younger sisters. yeah,
Kate Hughes: I think we may have talked about this, Josiah, because I have three brothers.
Kate Hughes: the rules are very different for me.
Doug: Yeah,
Kate Hughes: They just were. Like, I was grounded every weekend.
Doug: My sister and I were about this.
Doug: We're only like we're like irish twins. Yeah,
Kate Hughes: that's what my brother and I
Doug: Yeah, and I had different rules than her She just couldn't she couldn't go out like I could and stuff like that
Kate Hughes: And when that happens, you're like, Oh, why? You know, and your parents are like, We're just trying to protect
Doug: Yeah Well, let me go out with my brother.
Doug: He will protect me
Kate Hughes: that way. it's, it's funny. They didn't want me to ever
Kate Hughes: So I never did.
Kate Hughes: I showed them.
Josiah: So
[00:30:01] Relationships and Personal Stories
---
Josiah: you don't, you don't have any kids?
Kate Hughes: kids? Ew, no!
Doug: woah, woah, woah.
Josiah: Your Facebook. You recently got married just like two years ago? Yeah! Okay, how long were you guys engaged?
Kate Hughes: engaged? I, uh, tricked that guy.
Josiah: did, I did,
Kate Hughes: I did. I did. I tricked him. I asked him. I proposed to him. Wow. On
Doug: Oh.
Kate Hughes: On my one woman show. At the end of my one woman show.
Doug: Did he, and he had no idea? He,
Kate Hughes: idea? Heh. He knew he said he knew when I got up to do it
Doug: okay,
Kate Hughes: when I was gonna do it and nobody else
Doug: I was gonna say, did anybody else know you were gonna do it?
Doug: I
Kate Hughes: my one girlfriend have a confetti cannon in the front so she
Doug: knew.
Kate Hughes: and my dad lived in Florida at the time So I told I did tell my immediate family, but I didn't tell his family Because I wanted my dad to come in and I
Josiah: and where did you meet him since you went to an all girls college since
Kate Hughes: a hundred years old,
Josiah: I think
Doug: those girls meet more guys than the other ones
Kate Hughes: At college at college no, we uh, we met at work he I was his boss
Josiah: which which of the four jobs
Kate Hughes: Not any of these jobs jobs before this job. Okay. Yeah, and I he's younger than me. So I never even looked at him like He loves. When I tell this story, I never even looked at him like he's a man, like
Kate Hughes: he just didn't register,
Josiah: Was he a little
Doug: that's what attracted me to him.
Kate Hughes: That's why I liked
Doug: to hear! He's
Josiah: He's a little little boy or what what's
Kate Hughes: like, I just, he wasn't on my level, I guess. I don't know. I just didn't think, I wouldn't look at him and be like,
Josiah: Were you guys co workers? Was he your subordinate?
Kate Hughes: his boss.
Kate Hughes: Did you not hear me?
Josiah: was he was yours?
Kate Hughes: you. I had something
Doug: sitting in my back pocket waiting. I was gonna be like, oh, so then he said, Yes, I will be your subordinate.
Doug: Anyway, I screwed that up. So lame. Yeah, it was dumb. Yeah, and
Kate Hughes: You know, and I, I guess he me, and I
Kate Hughes: had no None.
Kate Hughes: my head, And then, I don't know how many years went by, And I was no longer working there,
Kate Hughes: a
Kate Hughes: drink, Which is, I have guy friends, and
Doug: you know at
Doug: the
Josiah: time, I was
Doug: did you think He meant like kool aid or soda
Josiah: he meant, like, Kool Aid or soda?
Josiah: I was like Apple juice. Only if
Josiah: you Sun. Capri
Doug: romantically arms length
Josiah: that's right. We
Kate Hughes: went out to the candy store. Um, no,
Doug: yeah, so
Kate Hughes: so we had some drinks and he was like,
Kate Hughes: you know, let me drive you home walk
Kate Hughes: Cause I was
Kate Hughes: on,
Doug: Let me just drive
Josiah: you
Doug: okay, fine You
Kate Hughes: fine. So I get in the
Doug: Piggyback! Get on the back!
Kate Hughes: And uh,
Kate Hughes: I'm looking at him and he's like, I love
Doug: I've mom I'm like looking behind me. I'm like what this is after two drinks. He is a boy
Kate Hughes: We had to drive yeah,
Josiah: no we were
Kate Hughes: were you know, I just never I never
Doug: How often did you guys hang out before that he was my friend too, but I mean like did you guys hang out in a group? Or just you guys. Oh, yeah Okay
Kate Hughes: But yeah, we would
Doug: occasionally like after an event or us would get a
Josiah: You see into art and comedy as well? Of course. Okay.
Josiah: Okay.
Kate Hughes: I got I got a thing for him.
Josiah: Yeah.
Josiah: And you're an artist as well.
Kate Hughes: Well, I mean I write
Josiah: You write. Right now. Okay.
[00:33:15] Art and Inspiration
---
Josiah: stuff. Do you do any like, I don't know physical art?
Kate Hughes: art I used to paint. Okay. I did photography there for a
Josiah: while. Alright. Okay.
Kate Hughes: and I did this series where I printed my photos on paper.
Kate Hughes: Actually, I did one of Caitlyn and that material and stitched
Doug: material.
Doug: Okay
Kate Hughes: These are not kind of cool, but yeah, I did, I did one of Caitlyn. It was women who inspire and I was like, I was going through this rough
Josiah: and
Kate Hughes: all these women
Kate Hughes: just
Kate Hughes: came in, they were in my life and they
Kate Hughes: just it. So it was like this year
Doug: nonsense and how
Kate Hughes: friends came in and just kind of
Josiah: of
Josiah: The women that you've stitched on this material, um.
Kate Hughes: He's going to say something funny or sarcastic.
Josiah: that. I
Kate Hughes: see it!
Josiah: Were, were any
Doug: The headlights are on
Kate Hughes: yep, he's like, here it comes. Vroom, vroom,
Doug: tunnel. I
Kate Hughes: here it comes. Let's hear it.
Kate Hughes: Alright, all aboard.
Josiah: here we go!
Doug: your bag
Kate Hughes: Were any
Josiah: of these women that, uh, inspired you? Were, were any of them funny?
Kate Hughes: Caitlyn,
Doug: Yeah,
Josiah: Other than, other
Doug: You had to have met Caitlyn before, but,
Josiah: Weren, funny comedian.
Kate Hughes: Oh yeah. They all have great senses
Josiah: humor. Okay.
Kate Hughes: But I don't think they're
Josiah: so that, that there goes your theory that women aren't funny.
Doug: yeah, I
Kate Hughes: meant
Josiah: Okay.
Doug: there's the train, folks. Jokes
Kate Hughes: by Joe. Jokes by
Doug: We're gonna get the next train there. Still got time in this beer.
[00:34:39] Upcoming Topics and Research
---
Josiah: All right. Question. Have you done your research? I sent you guys something on, uh, Vanessa 5,000.
Kate Hughes: that's where I stopped. 10430.
Josiah: Oh, nice. That
Kate Hughes: me watching it.
Josiah: Oh, that was you. Okay, so you got.
Josiah: Wait, it's only an hour long,
Kate Hughes: Is it?
Josiah: Yeah,
Doug: an hour.
Josiah: Did you watch any of it?
Doug: I watched the clip that you sent me from TikTok and I knew that's all I needed.
Josiah: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:35:00] Comedian's Special on Dropout
---
Josiah: So there's this comedian does this one hour show. She did it I think at a festival in Europe and the guy who owns college humor saw it and he is like, we need to put together a special and so. She said yes, they did a special, it's on Dropout, which is owned by College Humor, and it's, I was blown away by it. I sent it to Doug and he's like, is this what you want to do next? And I was
Doug: Josiah said he wants to Like, try to conquer every style of comedy. And it came out of the Doing, uh, crowd work. And then when he sent me this, I was like, Is this your next endeavor?
Kate Hughes: endeavor? So, I don't
[00:35:39] Debating the Comedian's Style
---
Josiah: my god, So, so, how much do you think you watched, like 20 minutes, or?
Kate Hughes: Oh god, I don't know. I thought
Doug: I watched
Doug: half of the clip that you sent
Josiah: So you didn't log in to drop out.
Josiah: I said you might log in
Kate Hughes: Yeah, I
Doug: in. No, I didn't want to watch it. I, it just, it, it didn't, it didn't intrigue me.
Doug: Sorry.
Kate Hughes: because she, because
Kate Hughes: she's a woman. No,
Kate Hughes: no.
Josiah: Oh, no. She's funny though.
Doug: No, I just, it didn't intrigue me. Once I start seeing the whole sexy thing, it's like, you're using a crutch.
Josiah: No. You know what it was? She's a sex robot. That was the character.
Doug: know. I got it. I got
Kate Hughes: half of
Josiah: got it.
Josiah: You got it. He wants
Kate Hughes: half of it.
Doug: Yeah.
Josiah: All right. Let's see if
Doug: I don't know, it just, maybe I caught the wrong clip, but it didn't, I didn't dig it.
Doug: i, I see that. I don't want to hear it.
Josiah: Oh my God. . It's
Doug: like, it's like, that means that you're not funny enough to just tell the jokes. disagree.
Josiah: so good. It's so good.
Kate Hughes: I, I think she's playing the game.
Josiah: Yeah. She has a whole story.
Josiah: that's fine. It's performance
Doug: art. Yeah, no, yeah, that's, that's, I don't know. It's not
Josiah: just standup comedy, it's performance
Doug: the thing, I like 100 percent stand up, I like a comedian to stand up there and tell me
Josiah: Right, right.
Kate Hughes: stand up there and tell me jokes.
Doug: I I'm not gonna lie, I've never heard you do stand up.
Kate Hughes: never heard
Doug: that way. Ha ha ha ha. Now I want to.
Doug: No,
Kate Hughes: to. But I think you can get up on
Kate Hughes: stage
Doug: you can get up on stage and tell jokes.
Kate Hughes: I can. I can, but sometimes it's not, you know, I don't, I don't
Doug: Have you ever told a joke and said, Damn it, that joke would work better if I was half naked?
Doug: No,
Kate Hughes: it's not even that. It's, it's, uh, she's She's figured it out. She's figured out how to, how
Doug: to. I think she's figured out how to just sell sex. Well, yeah, she's got
Doug: Yeah.
Doug: good for her. And I'm not, I'm not, listen, if it works, it works. I
Josiah: get it to work. I'm not fucking put the TV up for
Doug: not, I'm not, I'm not talking shit on her hustle.
Doug: That's not what I'm talking shit on. It
Doug: are.
Doug: I'm talking shit on, I can't listen to somebody who's.
Doug: That's what, I mean, come on. Again, will those jokes work if she was wearing a full on coat?
Josiah: Yeah, I mean you're right in the fact that that's the only reason I tuned
Doug: And if there, if there are jokes that have to have her dress like that, I'm not interested in hearing that type of comedy.
Doug: I think
Kate Hughes: here's what she does. She does this show, makes bank on it, never has to worry about it again. She can keep her clothes on. There's so many women that have had to do things that they don't want to do
Doug: Oh, absolutely.
Josiah: that
Doug: And that
Kate Hughes: Yeah, it does
[00:38:09] Louis CK Controversy
---
Josiah: let louis ck come on their backs
Kate Hughes: Like that, yes, 100%.
Doug: he make somebody do that?
Kate Hughes: All the time. Mm hmm.
Josiah: You're defending this guy again.
Doug: First of all, I'm never defending anybody this let's make that clear. What I'm saying is what no What I'm saying is the only people that I heard like Sarah Silverman who's very credible. She was good friends with
Josiah: let him.
Josiah: I'm saying is
Doug: she she was on Howard Stern talking about this So my point is how did he make her do that?
Josiah: No, he asked and she said yes. I'm talking about the people that didn't say yes.
Doug: I didn't, I didn't hear any stories where somebody didn't say yes.
Josiah: There's a lot
Doug: of them. Well, that's what I mean. Maybe I just didn't hear them.
Josiah: them. Or maybe it wasn't that they
Doug: send them to me. I wanted, I want
Kate Hughes: your, let me see your search
Doug: I want to be even with you guys.
Josiah: um, let's say up in Compton, Nobody Comedian is in a chalet lodge, ski lodge with Louis C. K. He says,
Doug: You want to
Josiah: get somewhere
Josiah: kid? Yeah, can I come on you?
Doug: he was doing
Kate Hughes: that?
Josiah: that. No, he was,
Doug: that he was doing
Josiah: Yeah, yeah, he said he admitted to it. Yeah.
Kate Hughes: on! who
Kate Hughes: doesn't know that Watch
Doug: listen if you're somebody who doesn't know that he said that and you only heard Sarah Silverman say I don't know it
Josiah: she came to his defense because
Doug: that's but that's what I'm saying so so if you didn't hear the other stuff you'd be like I didn't hear any of that.
Doug: Now that I hear it, yeah, of course I'm gonna, I'm not taking you two as my source. I'm gonna, I'm gonna research it.
Kate Hughes: do research. Have you heard about Bill
Doug: but I guess, I guess, I guess it didn't, I guess it didn't matter to me.
Josiah: Yeah.
Josiah: It's sort
[00:39:46] R. Kelly and Michael Jackson Discussion
---
Doug: of like, I don't, I would never leave my daughter with R. Kelly, but his songs are fucking banging. I'm not going to stop listening to R.
Doug: Kelly because of the
Kate Hughes: Oh
Doug: he
Kate Hughes: no, really?
Doug: Fuck no.
Kate Hughes: so here's what I, here's
Doug: in the name of love. I will put that on right now and I dare you, I will shock you guys if you don't move your
Josiah: I
Doug: to give somebody a challenge of listening to certain R. Kelly songs without grooving or anything.
Kate Hughes: Okay, Matt, you don't want to know what my, like, guilty pleasure, where people are like, Oh, Michael Jackson. Love him. He's
Josiah: Oh, he's amazing
Doug: How is beat it bad now? Because he did that.
Josiah: Who said it's bad.
Doug: There are people who like, I'm not listening to music sucks. And it's
Josiah: they got the wrong song. Bad is bad Beat. It is
Doug: No, but my point is he's right. He's got a point. Yeah. The Thriller album doesn't suck now because Michael Jackson did what he did.
Doug: Thriller album is
Kate Hughes: and he didn't do it. He didn't do it. By the way
Doug: if he did do it, didn't do it. If Thriller it did and didn't do it, thriller is still banging. It
Kate Hughes: but he didn't
Doug: But if he didn't, did do. It
Josiah: uh, here is something circumstantial evidence. It may be he named his son blanket.
Josiah: You know
Josiah: that. sure did.
Kate Hughes: did. I know everything about
Doug: Michael Johnson.
Josiah: Yeah. So, my only thing is, well, you know, what else you gonna call, what else you gonna call something that you sleep with at night?
Doug: Ohh, my god.
Kate Hughes: Jokes by Joe. Chugga chugga chugga chugga. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Josiah: Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Kate Hughes: I
Kate Hughes: have a lot of stuff I can't even
Kate Hughes: think of
Kate Hughes: right now.
[00:41:26] Don't Tell Comedy Show
---
Kate Hughes: Oh I have a don't tell show tomorrow! What's that? Don't tell
Kate Hughes: Yeah, I'm not gonna tell you.
Josiah: Oh, this won't, this won't be live by then, but.
Kate Hughes: I know, but it's Don't Tell Comedy.
Josiah: Okay. Oh, is that at Steel Stacks?
Kate Hughes: no, I can't
Kate Hughes: tell you. I can't tell you. It's
Doug: not getting it. He's just not getting it
Kate Hughes: it. He's not getting
Josiah: I've seen this pop up on my instagram. How did you get involved in? Don't tell comedy
Kate Hughes: They asked me, and I can't tell you who.
Josiah: Oh, wow,
Kate Hughes: in. I'm in. I'm in, guys. I'm
Josiah: so I need to buy tickets and then you just show up
Josiah: where you don't know where the venue is.
Doug: I
Kate Hughes: know who I'm
Josiah: I gotta go This thing is
Kate Hughes: I'm h I'm hosting.
Josiah: have you heard about this?
Doug: I get the ads for it all the time.
Kate Hughes: I ignore it
Josiah: Oh, so you're hosting
Doug: I'm
Kate Hughes: host, but
Josiah: I want to go
Kate Hughes: come.
Kate Hughes: Can
Josiah: Can you share a link?
Doug: Oh, you're hosting.
Kate Hughes: I'm hosting, so I get to go up and do I can't tell you!
Doug: do you know? You're when do you know the venue? How soon ahead do you go, Okay, babysitter, we can leave now, because we know what direction we're going in.
Kate Hughes: five minutes before.
Doug: is
Josiah: she has. She has no
Doug: be. That's how raves used to be in the 90s.
Doug: And the kids love it.
Josiah: I'm going, it's Friday.
Kate Hughes: Friday. I should probably just say it because this isn't even going to air. It's not. It won't matter.
Doug: on.
Josiah: Don't tell comedy.
Doug: No. It's
Doug: at American
Kate Hughes: Hairlines.
Josiah: Okay.
Kate Hughes: Broad and Main
Doug: right
Josiah: you work there, don't you?
Kate Hughes: I do.
Josiah: Okay, how do they do in comedy at a salon?
Josiah: beauty of these
Josiah: things. That's the beauty, she said.
Josiah: Oh,
Kate Hughes: the beauty! I
Josiah: the beauty. I didn't even know
Doug: How are they doing how are they doing comedy on the International Space Station,
Kate Hughes: Station?
Kate Hughes: Now
Doug: Now you're getting it.
Kate Hughes: it. I don't think I'm getting
Josiah: Can we just kidnap
Doug: Ha ha
Kate Hughes: go to it?
Doug: you see what we're doing
Josiah: I, I mean
Kate Hughes: kidnap a bunch of strangers.
Doug: I mean anywhere there's space you can do
Josiah: stand up.
Kate Hughes: I think they're in and around 20. 22, 25, something like
Josiah: the other comedians that are on it?
Doug: have to
Kate Hughes: don't know. I
Doug: you got to get your hair cut by the newest
Kate Hughes: They
Kate Hughes: used to get, like, um,
Josiah: they get like famous people.
Kate Hughes: Oh yeah, sometimes they do.
Josiah: Yeah, but I'm not on the, I'm not on the show, so that's weird. We did the same, we did the same joke.
Josiah: Yeah, we did.
Kate Hughes: did.
Doug: guys battled each other's ego
Kate Hughes: I just
Doug: and I just sat here like
Kate Hughes: oh
Josiah: Oh, gosh.
Doug: never be on it
Kate Hughes: No. That's not true. So now
Josiah: So now that you host, do you get to like, pick the next one or
Kate Hughes: No. nominate
Josiah: the next host or
Kate Hughes: No, I, I mean I don't, I don't know. I don't know
Kate Hughes: if Alright, so
Josiah: so you got that coming up. Great.
[00:44:03] Hosting and Open Mic Experiences
---
Josiah: Yeah, so you also do inkwell every other
Doug: Oh every other
Josiah: you host that as well?
Kate Hughes: I typically do unless I have an emergency. Now,
Josiah: Is that an open mic?
Josiah: Okay.
Josiah: but people pay to get in they
Kate Hughes: yes, they can, they can come and watch
Josiah: you actually have like real audience members
Kate Hughes: It's growing. Our last one we actually had real audience
Josiah: members, right?
Doug: i've done it i've done it a couple of times the over mic and it's I mean, it's good. It's just a good, I mean, it's always good to be on
Doug: stage. But there are times that are just, that things, because you're standing facing this way and behind you is the Hamilton Boulevard, right? So,
Josiah: You can always get distracted.
Doug: well, yeah, but it's, it only adds to it because, The comedian doesn't know what's happening behind them and they just think they're killing, right?
Josiah: it's just They're just laughing at the guy taking
Doug: But then it like
Kate Hughes: Yeah, yeah. It kind
Doug: kind of hypes them up to where now they're like, yeah, you know, yeah, and it just
Kate Hughes: The best,
Doug: Oh my goodness
Kate Hughes: I saw. The best one I saw was, I forget who it was. He was on stage and he was something like He's dating this, like, woman and she's a mess,
Josiah: whatever.
Josiah: on
Doug: cue, on cue,
Kate Hughes: pushing a
Doug: a shotgun. Oh, across the street. Across the street! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, who, I think that was Mike Valentine. Or, no, no, no, no, no, um. Who was it? Oh, I forget the, I forget his name. He
Kate Hughes: it was right on cue.
Doug: Well, because if you remember he was looking he was looking this way or he was like looking this way and she's coming across the street Like this way, so he doesn't see her and then he turns around and looks at Hamilton Boulevard this way And now she's behind him on that side.
Doug: So he never saw her but we just and oh man. Yeah, that was
Josiah: And then
Kate Hughes: and then we have this one little boy, every open mic he comes over and
Kate Hughes: then he
Josiah: He's a boy?
Kate Hughes: He's a boy,
Josiah: He does stand up?
Doug: He's outside. To her second husband. Not like
Kate Hughes: Yeah, like I'm young! He's gonna be my second
Doug: yeah. Yeah, he just lives on the shirt. He like
Josiah: He knows when you guys are going to be there
Kate Hughes: he knows! He knows someone's on stage and
Josiah: he
Doug: would the joke work if he wasn't trying to be sexy? Right! Good point, Doug.
Kate Hughes: definitely trying to be. How old
Josiah: How old is this boy?
Kate Hughes: are you so interested in this boy? It
Doug: It did come to like a exit
Kate Hughes: here. What does
Doug: to just be
Kate Hughes: like? What does
Josiah: Yep. Alright, alright. So, anyway.
Josiah: Courtney Peruso does this show called Vanessa 5000. I think it's brilliant. I think it's brilliant. Doug, give it a chance. It's on Dropout.
Doug: I will.
Josiah: it's very good. That's all I wanted to say about that. Okay,
Doug: I'm gonna tie myself down in my clockwork orange basement.
Doug: Yes. Where I keep my eyes on him. I mean,
Josiah: I mean, you
Kate Hughes: couldn't have made it easier for
Doug: for him. You
Kate Hughes: have the code, the password.
Doug: you send me the co I thought you asked me if I could I thought you said, do you want me to send you the code?
Josiah: I said I did that and then I emailed you the
Doug: Oh. Oh, okay. Alright.
Kate Hughes: I just want, for the record, I did my homework. To the best of my
Kate Hughes: ability.
Kate Hughes: I watched most of it.
Doug: I don't care if
Josiah: Did you, did you like it?
Josiah: I
Josiah: did Did you think she was did you think she was genius? Cause I did.
Kate Hughes: That's what I was saying. I think, I think she, she's doing what she has to do to
Josiah: get a brilliant. Did you pick up on the part where, When she goes to an audience member, and she gets their name, like, Matt.
Josiah: Yeah, Matt. She does, she says, and each person that she asks, she does their name, mimics how they say the name to her, and it's so fucking funny. Yeah, it's she's so good. And then at the end, you know, there's a climax. She has actually a
Kate Hughes: there's a climax
Josiah: a climax. You didn't you didn't get that far but
Kate Hughes: it's Yeah, I don't wanna get to the Clima.
Josiah: that's netflix i'm not i'm not sharing that one
Doug: Oh netflix. That sounds painful want to can
Kate Hughes: I, can I just say this quickly? I wanna tell you why I didn't finish. It wasn't 'cause I didn't want to, I had to, I had
Kate Hughes: to take
Kate Hughes: a phone was
Josiah: yeah, you have four jobs.
Josiah: I understand. Okay, you're busy. Yeah, that's
Kate Hughes: But I would've
Doug: uh, two days a week and every other weekend, and I just didn't find the time.
Josiah: are you serious? You only work two days a week, so
Doug: So lucky! Well, I do two days a week, and then when I work the weekend, I work three days. Okay. So, it averages out, but, like, I worked Tuesday and yesterday, and I actually took off Saturday and Sunday, so I don't go back to work till Monday.
Josiah: Nice.
Josiah: you working, are you workshopping anything, uh, Kate?
[00:48:31] Joke Workshop and Period Jokes
---
Josiah: You want to at the end of the show, we like to like, sort of, workshop some jokes. Oh seen. I
Kate Hughes: never do that.
Kate Hughes: I
Doug: Don't you, don't you hate it, don't you hate a crowd of, uh, comedians, but how about two that are staring right at
Josiah: right at you? No,
Doug: Don't you think those jokes are gonna work?
Doug: No, thank you. Those
Josiah: You don't
Doug: are
Josiah: anything like, like you jotted down and you want to sort of workshop.
Kate Hughes: I mean, I have the
Josiah: a premise or something.
Kate Hughes: wanna do it right now?
Kate Hughes: Is that what I'm
Josiah: Yeah, if you want
Doug: You're telling everybody your
Josiah: sorry, I should have had you you know, when I was, when I did her show, um, WX, what is it?
Josiah: Please? WLIV WXLV WXLV
Doug: How could you not
Josiah: on I heart radio. She has the lunch hour. It's with, with Kate Hughes on I Hate Kate from 12 to 3. You could probably promote it a little better than I could. But I had to, I had to provide six
Doug: songs. You're gonna love her, but I
Josiah: And I never had six songs prepared. And then I gave them to her, like, while we're, right before we're about to go on air.
Josiah: And she was able to get the six songs, like, in the queue. Like,
Josiah: I was very very impressed. She was on it. Yeah, she's a professional No,
Kate Hughes: okay. So
Doug: I can tell you this one
Josiah: joke that I'm
Doug: gonna do tomorrow
Kate Hughes: night.
Josiah: Okay?
Josiah: Yes
Doug: are too
Kate Hughes: eager. Are you gonna steal my jokes?
Josiah: Absolutely not. What do you do? We're not hacks here
Kate Hughes: Okay, I'll know, because this one's This joke is about my period, so
Doug: so
Josiah: I'm not definitely not taking that one I'm already recording dog.
Josiah: This is a podcast.
Kate Hughes: is a podcast. Wait a second! You're trying to
Doug: trying to tell me your period is different than my period?
Kate Hughes: period? Bullshit.
Josiah: I'll never, I'll never forget South Park. I never trust anything that bleeds for four days and doesn't
Kate Hughes: That's
Doug: that a long time ago. Yeah, Richard Pryor said that. He said that a long time ago,
Josiah: Wow, I didn't know
Doug: yeah. That was an old, like, joke, yeah.
Josiah: Oh
Doug: that was like, something people said.
Josiah: That's where I heard it, but go ahead.
Doug: I'm sorry. were
Josiah: throw our scent off?
Doug: Mmm,
Josiah: It works. It works. I think a lot of guys
Kate Hughes: that that's what we talk about. Cramps and stuff like that, right? So, you know, I sometimes I'll open with that. You gotta feel the
Doug: audience. Like, do they hate
Josiah: you? Uh huh. Are
Kate Hughes: are some of them okay
Doug: with you, or do they
Kate Hughes: all
Josiah: hate you? Do you open with, do I open with period or? Do I say
Kate Hughes: something to the tune of like, You know, I know women aren't And sometimes it works, and I'm like, so you're gonna talk about my period, and my
Doug: cats,
Doug: And when I get my period
Kate Hughes: all over my cats. Oh,
Josiah: we get my period all over my cats. Yeah,
Kate Hughes: and then I have them, and then
Kate Hughes: they're like, Oh!
Kate Hughes: god,
Doug: She's not gonna talk about
Kate Hughes: her period, and then I don't.
Kate Hughes: That was
Kate Hughes: all But I
Doug: Wait, wait, has anybody ever upset at the end, like, Listen, goddammit,
Josiah: God damn
Doug: I came here for your period
Josiah: I don't
Kate Hughes: not the period
Doug: period on pussy material! Get
Kate Hughes: to it! Get back to
Josiah: I can tell
Kate Hughes: tell you though, at the Emmaus Theatre, when I did the,
Doug: I
Josiah: was
Kate Hughes: America's Funniest, so Lehigh Valley's Funniest.
Kate Hughes: So I do this joke where I get everyone in the crowd to give me a standing And it has worked. Every
Josiah: Can I play the guy in the audience?
Josiah: this? Yeah, I do.
Doug: So then I,
Kate Hughes: so America's Funniest, and I'm like,
Doug: I'm gonna
Kate Hughes: So I do the whole thing that I normally do. And then I'm like,
Josiah: alright everybody, let's do
Kate Hughes: Let's try it right
Kate Hughes: now. Come
Kate Hughes: And then this one guy, like no one, no. And my husband was there. He didn't even stand up. No one
Doug: Wow.
Kate Hughes: up. No one clapped.
Kate Hughes: No one stood up. And I'm like, come on, everybody.
Doug: come on! And this, I'm
Josiah: a
Kate Hughes: Ready? And then this one guy. You
Josiah: gotta earn it
Kate Hughes: yells that at me. Hold on, I'm
Doug: on! I'm fixin it! I'm fixin it! How long were you doing this? Come on, everybody.
Kate Hughes: were you doing this? Where he just
Doug: Where you just finally hear somebody go, You
Kate Hughes: gotta earn it! Let's move
Doug: on here! Get to the period, pussy
Kate Hughes: is a period pussy joke.
Kate Hughes: Yeah, yeah. Come on, I want you to bleed.
Josiah: want you
Kate Hughes: to bleed all over that
Josiah: pussy. I want that pussy to bleed all over that pussy.
Kate Hughes: You're like this, uh, you just mouth. Gotta hurt it. Yes. Can you believe that? I mean, can you believe that?
Doug: Oh wow. And everybody always does. They don't wanna do it for me. And that got a, did that get a laugh? No. Oh, he, him saying that didn't get a laugh. Everyone's
Josiah: like,
Kate Hughes: a lot of attention. Yeah,
Doug: shooting six shooters in the rooftop. Come on dad.
Kate Hughes: shooting six years in a
Josiah: of the people were there for her!
Kate Hughes: on!
Doug: Oh, wow.
Josiah: get it.
Kate Hughes: still
Doug: your husband's still sitting there like yeah
Kate Hughes: Yeah, get off the stick! I ain't fanning for this
Josiah: paying it
Kate Hughes: true. I'm
Josiah: having
Doug: having three drinks tonight. You're
Kate Hughes: driving. Yeah, yeah.
Kate Hughes: Holy fuck.
Josiah: happened to me.
Kate Hughes: really happened to
Josiah: you not using that
Doug: Holy
Josiah: Yeah.
Doug: Oh, I used it the
Kate Hughes: night.
Doug: And it worked.
Kate Hughes: it crushed because
Doug: That's what
Josiah: That
Kate Hughes: there. Yeah. That, that guy didn't come to that
Josiah: show. You
Doug: you get so much hype for a joke because it works like 5, 6 times and then that one time it doesn't. It was a
Kate Hughes: it was a contest.
Kate Hughes: And I was like one of three girls that
Doug: Oh,
Kate Hughes: there was 15 contestants, three girls. There's
Josiah: just
Doug: I
Kate Hughes: You saw not enough. Funny.
Doug: No, I just, I can't stop, I can't stop going back to my head.
Doug: You just go, give me a standing ovation, everybody. Come on. And they're doing nothing.
Kate Hughes: Nothing. They hated me.
Doug: me.
Josiah: Can
Kate Hughes: move
Doug: out of their seats to lay on the floor, so they can be even
Kate Hughes: on the floor, it's gonna be even lower. You're just up
Doug: you're just up there like,
Kate Hughes: Come on everybody! Come on! Come on! Come on everybody! Yeah.
Josiah: Come on!
Kate Hughes: gonna go
Doug: Oh, sorry. I had to go
Kate Hughes: That's the part that
Doug: the part that is making
Kate Hughes: that's, yeah,
Josiah: And that's,
Kate Hughes: no, they did not give
Doug: you're just kind of like, This is where it works, people.
Josiah: is
Doug: This is the part where I'm usually done
Kate Hughes: with the joke. Right. The next time she
Josiah: that joke, she lifted up her shirt.
Kate Hughes: Yeah! I was like, alright,
Doug: said it with a robotic voice. Come on, everybody. Give me a, stand up for me. I
Josiah: fuck.
Doug: Oh man, well that's, alright.
Doug: So that's the fun part of stand up, is that now you can't trust that joke ever
Doug: again. Ever
Doug: again. When you trust the joke, it will fucking, it'll cut ya. So do you have anything else that
Doug: you were saying after that?
Kate Hughes: Oh, um,
Doug: Not that you shouldn't do, I mean, definitely do it. It worked more than the time it didn't.
Doug: Those people
Josiah: were not my people. And it was my responsibility
Doug: get them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I couldn't get them. And it was only five minutes. And I really thought, I
Josiah: really
Kate Hughes: thought, 'cause
Josiah: were like we were not gonna,
Doug: you know, turn your mic off, but, Yeah. Like, be respectful. Right, right. For like the
Kate Hughes: next one.
Kate Hughes: So I was like, I
Doug: got the light and I
Josiah: was like I
Doug: this up. And I, I the end. Yeah. Yeah. Started speeding up. And no
Josiah: one I mean they hated me.
Josiah: They hated me
Doug: And then at the end, I
Doug: was just like I'm just going to
Josiah: get in my car. I just got off the stage
Kate Hughes: and got in my
Doug: What time's that train coming?
Kate Hughes: train coming?
Doug: Just going to stand in front of it.
Kate Hughes: front of it.
Kate Hughes: Oh yeah, yeah,
Josiah: you go.
Kate Hughes: No, but the joke that I wanna do tomorrow night, and
Doug: hosting
Doug: is pretty cool because
Kate Hughes: they don't like
Kate Hughes: first three
Doug: minutes. I've hosted so many times and yeah, they're just like,
Doug: Can
Doug: we get to the real work here?
Josiah: get to the real jokes. Yeah, so that's how I
Doug: feel all the time.
Kate Hughes: So I'm like, I'm the perfect person to host. Because they
Doug: already are like, Oh God, what does this little girl do now?
Doug: But Hosting, you end up being the, um,
Kate Hughes: Mac Daddy.
Doug: Well, I was thinking, like, you're kind of like the, like, when you take your kid on one of those train rides up north, they have that thing, and there's that, where you can see the conductor, you know what I mean? He's just like, oh, look over here at the trees! That's basically what you're doing as a host.
Doug: You're carrying the crowd. Along these sites. Yeah.
Josiah: got to keep the energy up for the, for the next comment.
Doug: You're the one that's, and that's, that to me is fun. I like doing that. I like doing that. Yeah. Yeah.
Josiah: All right. So what do you, what do you, what do you, what do you plan on doing? Let's hear it.
Kate Hughes: Um, so I
Kate Hughes: have
Doug: I'm sort of, you know, like,
Kate Hughes: you,
Kate Hughes: after this election I was like, oh I couldn't get out of
Doug: bed the
Josiah: next
Josiah: day
Kate Hughes: Super depressed and I do jokes about like four women kind of thing Anyway, you know because we're so outnumbered So I just thought i'll kind of like double down on the
Doug: inequality very obvious regardless
Doug: regardless of again.
Josiah: I'm
Kate Hughes: against So I do this thing about the presidents.
Kate Hughes: So
Josiah: I've
Josiah: I say
Doug: like it's almost
Kate Hughes: I don't even know, what is he? He's gonna be forty what?
Doug: Who? Uh, 47th, yeah. 47th.
Josiah: Unless, uh, Joe Biden lets Kamala in, then, then all his merch. Right, the merch goes out. Yeah. Then So
Kate Hughes: forty seven. So, and then
Kate Hughes: Obama
Josiah: Forty Five? Forty five? Forty six? Forty five?
Doug: Well, after 47 goes 46, right? Or
Josiah: before. Before, yeah.
Doug: I don't know which one he was. Who? 45. Biden? He was 46. No, not Biden. Oh, Obama. Oh, Obama, I think 44th?
Doug: 44 Yeah Okay, Right? no
Doug: 40, 43, 44.
Josiah: Guys,
Kate Hughes: We sound like Rain Man.
Josiah: No, so I
Doug: do this
Doug: thing
Kate Hughes: where I'm like, oh, let's just
Doug: look
Josiah: at it like take
Kate Hughes: all
Doug: the
Doug: and like, let's look
Kate Hughes: at
Kate Hughes: it let's think about the presidents. It's
Kate Hughes: white guy, white guy,
Kate Hughes: white guy, white guy, white guy,
Kate Hughes: white guy, white guy, white guy.
Kate Hughes: white guy, white guy, Okay.
Kate Hughes: guy, and I do it Do you do it, do you do it 45 times? Oh, that's great.
Kate Hughes: And then I say black guy
Doug: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like that. Yeah,
Josiah: huh.
Kate Hughes: White guy, white
Doug: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And the white guy, white guy, white guy, they're already laughing.
Doug: So
Josiah: Yeah, yeah,
Doug: Yeah, yeah. That's good.
Kate Hughes: I want to do the
Josiah: you know, and you have to
Kate Hughes: feel that energy. So that's what I thought, like, with the girl. I'm sorry, I don't remember the naked girl that you made
Doug: Oh,
Josiah: Courtney Peruso.
Doug: The naked girl. She didn't say the funny one. She said the naked one.
Kate Hughes: said the naked one. Yeah. Wait, wait.
Josiah: I made her watch. Oh, I made you.
Kate Hughes: wanted that on, I wanted that on record. You're
Doug: trying to make me. Come on, watch
Kate Hughes: on, watch the
Josiah: You probably, you probably won't like it, but you might appreciate it.
Doug: to your research, stop being Louis C.
Doug: K. for Christ's sake. I like that. I
Kate Hughes: Louis
Josiah: going to come to the show because I want to see that.
Doug: Yeah, that sounds, that's a funny one. Oh,
Josiah: thanks man.
Doug: Now I'm gonna blow it.
Josiah: No, no, no, no. I told you this is, you don't have to
Kate Hughes: to hear me! You have
Josiah: any, any workshopping things you want to discuss?
Doug: I think it's low hanging fruit, so I can't imagine I'm the only one who thinks it, but I was like, well, technically doesn't this make Trump a woman beater?
Josiah: Oh, I haven't heard that yet.
Doug: pretty good. That's it. I feel like that, I feel like
Josiah: that's good.
Doug: I feel like there's every, every Greenwich Village Yeah. comedy club in the basement is, there's somebody at least saying that one
Doug: I want to talk about your stuff. Like I want to hear
Josiah: my whole thing is, um, I've got this thought experiment. And, like, sometimes I do this. Like, if you could swap the meaning of any two words in the English language, what would they be? And my two words were, since it's around the election, vote and fart, okay? So now, to vote means to fart, and to fart means to vote.
Josiah: You with me? Okay? Come home, you come home from work, right? Like, oh my god, what's that smell? Oh, holy shit, who voted? Was that you, honey? Oh my god. Promise me you won't vote like that again until midterms, okay? Jesus Christ, next time use a voting booth. Holy
Doug: shit.
Doug: Yeah, I like it.
Josiah: And then, uh, your wife reminds you, Well, you know, the average person votes twelve times a day.
Josiah: Twelve times a day? Holy shit. Sounds like voter fraud to me, huh? Then on election day you get to remind your mom to fart. And she's like, Oh, don't worry, honey. I farted this morning. You wouldn't believe the line. There's this longest line of farters wrapped around the building. I'm afraid some people wouldn't be able to fart on time.
Josiah: I'm like, well, that's how it's designed, mom. They don't want you to be able to fart. They're trying to suppress the fart.
Josiah: kid
Doug: with me to fart.
Doug: I
Josiah: it. You like it? Yeah. Thank you.
Kate Hughes: took my
Doug: kid with me to fart.
Josiah: Sorry, . Did you?
Josiah: I
Doug: got
Kate Hughes: sticker. I got a sticker. I farted.
Doug: for how I farted. Yeah, I farted.
Kate Hughes: farted. Yeah.
Doug: No, I like that. I think there's a lot, there's a lot to it there. There can be a lot more, you know, a lot
Josiah: Yeah. Mailin,
Doug: there's a lot of different ways you can go.
Josiah: You know, I wouldn't be, wouldn't be the guy opening those envelopes, whatever. Yeah. I
Doug: feel
Kate Hughes: like it would be physical, like a physical with the bod.
Josiah: Yeah.
Kate Hughes: I don't know what, though.
Josiah: Sure, sure, sure.
Doug: It just feels that way.
Josiah: Oh, are you doing open mics tonight?
Doug: I'm thinking about
Josiah: Are you, are you going?
Josiah: I
Kate Hughes: have to work all of my jobs
Doug: she has four jobs
Josiah: have it, you have to go to a job after this?
Josiah: It's,
Doug: a,
Josiah: it's, I work, you But I'm
Kate Hughes: sales. I gotta sell some stuff by like,
Josiah: Okay, on Etsy?
Doug: ha ha!
Kate Hughes: selling feet pictures.
Josiah: now.
Josiah: I'm
Doug: ha ha! Yeah. Are you taking pictures right now? Wait, I, I, I forgot I have another show.
Kate Hughes: Can I talk about my shows? I don't know how
Josiah: shows I have. Yeah,
Doug: Let's talk about anything. Yeah, so this is, this
Kate Hughes: is
Josiah: really great.
Kate Hughes: Uh, Godfrey Daniels, have you
Doug: performed but
Josiah: to change
Kate Hughes: well we
Doug: there?
Doug: I thought you meant, I think, I was, I heard Gilbert Godfrey.
Kate Hughes: Godfrey
Josiah: Daniels.
Doug: Oh no, I've not
Kate Hughes: not. Oh no! That's great! Aw, that's
Josiah: name of a
Doug: Where is it?
Kate Hughes: on the south side of Bethlehem
Josiah: Bethlehem. I've actually never been there.
Doug: I've never been there.
Kate Hughes: Oh my god, it's
Doug: awesome. yeah.
Kate Hughes: Oh, yeah, they have uh downstairs like
Kate Hughes: green room like
Josiah: but mostly it's like acoustic stuff, right?
Doug: Well, it
Kate Hughes: was always
Doug: music
Josiah: singer songwriter stuff.
Doug: they've
Kate Hughes: around for like
Kate Hughes: 50 they just started kind of trying
Josiah: Do you.
Josiah: have an in you have an in there you can get us
Kate Hughes: yes,
Josiah: right
Doug: you get us in? Can you get us in? You're saying if I walk down there I'm gonna have to know you to get in?
Josiah: You gotta earn
Kate Hughes: it
Doug: I mean like the way he's saying it, like just, just fucking go.
Doug: Yeah, yeah. Just go. Oh, you can go in there, but I'm doing a show
Kate Hughes: december wonderland
Josiah: You can't do
Kate Hughes: I think that's the right
Doug: That's the first day that,
Josiah: day of our open mic thing that we're doing.
Kate Hughes: Oh, that's right. It
Josiah: Country Club Comedy.
Kate Hughes: do it. Yeah, because I have that show. summer
Josiah: We're competing for
Kate Hughes: yeah Members may the best man
Josiah: Yeah, seriously.
Kate Hughes: i'm
Doug: It's gonna be a
Josiah: Well, that's
Kate Hughes: Doubt it. Yeah, so it's singers
Doug: then I open up.
Kate Hughes: and then at the end of the night It's a
Doug: Christmas
Doug: show
Doug: everybody
Doug: in the audience
Kate Hughes: sings a
Kate Hughes: Christmas song So they've done this every I don't know Doug. It's not my
Doug: Oh, I thought I thought it was like a thing.
Doug: Yeah, it
Kate Hughes: is a thing but I've never done
Doug: it before,
Kate Hughes: so but yeah and it's next fave band I don't know if you know that
Kate Hughes: guy. Philip
Doug: Oh,
Doug: I can tell you a text that I sent to
Doug: my two friends that I'm going to be hanging out with this weekend.
Josiah: Okay.
[01:04:14] Tooth Fairy Mission Impossible
---
Doug: So last night my son lost one of his teeth and I had to be the tooth fairy. So I set an alarm for 10 o'clock and in the meantime I'm We're trying to make plans.
Doug: But anyway I had to this was the most mission impossible one that i've had to do so far. He was asleep But he had his arm under the pillow And my hands were freezing because I was out back hanging out And so I'm trying to get the money in and he's doing the the like complete movie thing where he's like snoring and then stopping and moving and I'm like
Josiah: trying
Doug: and I'm trying to freeze but my knees are locking up you know what I mean and and then I finally get it done and I get downstairs oh well I went to walk out the door and my 10 o'clock alarm
Kate Hughes: o'clock
Doug: and I I grabbed nothing he didn't wake up or anything like that but yeah that happened too
Kate Hughes: that
Doug: Yeah, and I yeah, it was it was like right when I'm closing the door like
Josiah: bling,
Kate Hughes: bling, bling, bling, I'm
Josiah: was like, going
Doug: and forth saying what is going on over there But I said, uh, sorry I was in the middle of being Joey's fifth tooth fairy
Doug: If my house ever gets raided and finds all the teeth in my sock drawer, they're gonna, they're gonna give Lauren all the evidence she needs to live happy with that hot neighbor dude who likes to jog with no shirt on past our house. Sorry, I realized I could have just sent a laugh emoji and you guys wouldn't be worried about me right now. Um, and then I sent a laugh emoji.
Kate Hughes: a My favorite color
Josiah: is blue. Yeah,
Doug: But there are, there are five teeth in my sock drawer right now
Josiah: That's great. So we get the, we get the pillow that it's a little tiny pillow that says tooth fairy on it. And it's got a little pocket for the tooth and you hang the pillow on the doorknob so that you don't have to do, you know, mission impossible.
Josiah: Yeah. To go through and put the the money under the, on the pillow.
Doug: smart. I wanna see how, like, how many teeth I can get in before he figures it out.
Kate Hughes: He's figured it out.
Doug: No, he truly doesn't because today he only came down with a dollar and I was like I put do under there, right and so so anyway, I was like
Doug: When he got home from school, I was like I said, you know You know how I tell you got double check your homework and sometimes you find mistakes and stuff like that I said maybe I said when is when is the to ferry ever left just one dollar and I was like Maybe you got a double check the pillow or whatever and he went up and double checked and found it.
Doug: He was like Oh
Doug: Oh, you were right! You were right! And
Doug: I was like, yes, I
Doug: was right about the lies I'm telling you.
Kate Hughes: you're like,
Doug: Yes, Joey.
Josiah: to
Doug: up to me. I am the liar who loves you.
Josiah: Joey, Joey, let that be a lesson to you. You gotta earn it.
Kate Hughes: Okay.
Doug: I'm teaching them about politics. Yeah, you are. We
Kate Hughes: got it.
[01:07:09] Conclusion and Farewell
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Josiah: Thank you, Kate, for joining the Jokes by Joe
Doug: Standing ovation! ovation! Come on, guys!
Kate Hughes: Come on.
Kate Hughes: Standing ovation. Come on.
Doug: Come
Josiah: I wonder if like, when Her and her husband, um,
Doug: Nah, we're done. Give it in!
Kate Hughes: we go